Feeling Overwhelmed

I am feeling a bit overwhelmed this week and starting to wonder if I have bitten off more than I can chew.  This week has been such a whirlwind that I can't seem to catch my breath.  I mean that figuratively and literally.  I feel somewhat panicky this morning and like the world is closing in on me.  Sort of like I felt on Sunday when the chairs were arranged so close together I could hardly stand up straight or lean over without knocking myself in the head on the chair in front of me.  The reality is overall I'm really not doing that much, but my body just can't keep up.  This weather is not helping.  The cold and the rain have me in a lot of pain.  Add in exhaustion and all I want to do is stay in the bed.


I have been reminded repeatedly I haven't given an update on my appointment with Dr. Gaw on Monday.  I just haven't had time during the day and by the time things slow down at night I am just too tired to even hold up my head.  Since Monday I have attended two bible studies, had two church committee meetings, had a doctor's appointment and worked for Darryl.  I was so exhausted from Monday, that I slept all day on Tuesday.


My appointment went very well.  I'm stable.  No worse, no better.  He wants me to let him know when I get in to see Dr. Peltier.  He said he wants to make sure I keep seeing her.  He doesn't think it's urgent I get in, but he wants me to keep following up with her so we will have her on board if the time comes we have to start the retuxin.  That's still on the back burner.  I absolutely hate the idea of having to start that treatment, but there is some comfort in knowing there is a plan if things were to start going south.  It is a risky treatment, but that is just where I am.  For know, it's the only option for treatment if I begin to regress.  It may be an unpleasant option, but it's an option.  My next scheduled appointment is in four months.  I am still waiting on Vanderbilt to call about my appointment with Dr. Peltier.  Praise the Lord I have a friend who has volunteered to take me.  That is such a relief.


I ask that you pray about my energy level and that the pain in my arms and legs will settle down.  Please pray I have some wisdom about whether or not I need to give some things up.

And pray for my emotions and that I will stop over analyzing everything ... just a recipe for a disaster.  I need to keep my eyes on Jesus ... not on how I am disappointing other and how others are disappointing me.


Alex the wonder dog is laying beside me sound asleep and whining.  Ever so often he keeps nudging closer and closer to me.  I should follow his example.  I should be nudging myself closer and closer to Jesus.