Betraying Feelings

"Never doubt in darkness what you once believed in the light."

This quote is from the devotional from Joni and Friends today.  It was originally written in her Pearls of Great Price devotional book she wrote in 2006, I think.  And Joni quoted it from a friend.

It's worth quoting many times over.  It's such a simple reminder to me what Darryl has told me for years, "Your feelings will betray you."  What we feel is not truth, especially in our darkest moments.

I feel alone.

But my Heavenly Father has never once left me.  Not even for one second.

... for He Himself has said, “ I WILL NEVER DESERT YOU, NOR WILL I EVER FORSAKE YOU,” ~ Hebrews 13:5

I feel like there is no hope.

But with God all things are possible.  And Paul reminds those who are His in Romans 8 all things will work together for our good and His glory.

And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose. ~ Romans 8:28

I feel like He doesn't hear my prayers.  It's as if my pleas are falling on deaf ears, and sometimes it even feels like He's ignoring me.  Even David reminds himself over and over throughout the Psalms the Lord does hear him.

I love the LORD, because He hears My voice and my supplications. ~ Psalm 116:1

But know that the LORD has set apart the godly man for Himself; The LORD hears when I call to Him. ~ Psalm 4:3

It's a gorgeous day today.  The sun is shining bright.  The sky is clear.  The temperature is perfect.

And yet life feels so dark and cold.

I am grateful my feelings aren't truth.

I am grateful I have a Heavenly Father who never changes.  He's the same when it's dark as He is in the bright light.

Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever. ~ Hebrews 13:8

He is the bright Light.  The Light of Truth that shines on my untrue feelings.

 This is the message we have heard from Him and announce to you, that God is Light, and in Him there is no darkness at all. ~ I John 1:5

Then Jesus again spoke to them, saying, “ I am the Light of the world; he who follows Me will not walk in the darkness, but will have the Light of life.” ~ John 8:12

I think life feels so dark because the Lord has shone Light on so many ugly, dark things.  It's exposed, and it hurts.

And I can't fix any of it.

He has most definitely put a bright light on that idol of mine.  The fixer in me doesn't want to hand it over to the Lord once and for all.  I don't like His timetable.  I want it done now.

Obviously that's not part of His plan.

And it's hard.

I'm tired.

I'm overwhelmed.

It hurts.

I'm sad, and sometimes even distraught.

I feel hopeless, helpless.

I feel forgotten and forsaken at times.

And that makes life feel dark.

So, I am grateful my feelings aren't truth.

I am grateful my Jesus is the Light that shines upon what is true.

His truth.

When His lamp shone over my head, And by His light I walked through darkness; ~ Job 29:3O 

send out Your light and Your truth, let them lead me; Let them bring me to Your holy hill And to Your dwelling places. ~ Psalm 43:3