Praying for Baby Mary

As I begin this post, surgery is to begin on our friends' newborn daughter, Mary Elizabeth.  I'm asking you to take a moment to pray, and every time she comes to your mind, pray again.

Around 20 weeks of pregnancy a routine ultrasound revealed she had issues with her heart that would require surgery if she survived the pregnancy.  Later on in the pregnancy, they discovered there are also issues with her airway.

First of all, her surviving birth is a miracle.  Looking at statistics., chances were slim.  They were told she may not even survive the pregnancy, and if she did, she might not make it out of the delivery room.

God is so much bigger than statistics.  He's not a god of chances.  He is sovereign.  He has a perfect plan for Mary's life.  She has a life of much purpose.

As I look at pictures of this beautiful baby girl, all I can see is Jesus.  Jesus, the healer.  Jesus, the miracle worker.  Jesus, the giver of life.

No one knows what His plan is from here.  We are praying she survives surgery, and that the doctors are able to correct the issues with her heart and airway.  We are praying she is protected from infections or complications from surgery.  We are praying she is healed.

We've already seen God answer so many prayers.  Step by step, moment by moment.  I have become increasingly aware of His grace and mercy.

And pray for her parents, Kandice and Landon.  I really can't imagine going through anything harder in life than what they are walking through right now.  They've been so honest about their fears, and still they are trusting the Lord.  They are trusting Him and praising Him.

Not only have they been such a blessing to me, I've heard so many people say the same.

This will be a very long day for them.  Please pray Kandice is able to quickly recover.  Pray that they continuously feel the Lord's presence with them through every moment of this day.

Mary is only 2 days old, and already the Lord has used her in such a mighty way.

Counting The Gifts I've Been Given

I read the book One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp this past year.

Twice actually.  And I gave it to 4 people.

I loved it that much.  I don't read an entire book that doesn't revolve around a bible study often, and I had no idea when I first read this book a bible study was being done.  I was so excited when I found out.

Until I was asked to lead it.

Just reading the sentence, " ... and I think you should be the one to lead it." just about made me throw up.

Seriously.

Reluctantly, I said I'd pray about it.  What I've not told anyone to this day is my prayer was, "Lord, please, please find someone else to lead this study.  I don't want to do it."

He didn't.

Upon further investigation I discovered it's a DVD series study and comes with a handy study guide.  That I can do without the need of a Zofran IV.

A few weeks ago I bought the DVDs and watched all them in one night.  I got them on a Saturday and had to pass them to my pastor the next day.  All studies done through my church have to be approved by the session, and time was fast approaching for them to meet next.

By this time I was in love with the study.  So my prayer went from begging the Lord to find someone else to lead the study, to begging Him for them to approve it.

Approved it was, and now I cannot wait to get started.  January 14 the Monday night study will begin, and January 22 the Tuesday morning study begins.  Yes, I'm holding two studies at once.  Sounds a little nuts, I know, but I have become so passionate about this study.  I want to make it possible for every lady to participate.  It's just easier for there to be a daytime and a nighttime group.  Each group will only meet every other week, and they will alternate weeks.  Plus, I'm not having teach it.  I'm only facilitating.

I'm excited to get started, and can hardly wait!  In the meantime, I think I'm going to try something else.  Hopefully, I can keep this up.

Ann started The Joy Dare last year, and is doing it again this year.  Each day she gives you a category and you're supposed to list three gifts.  It's a count down to 1,000 gifts throughout the year.  The idea is you count 3 gifts per day, and by the end of the year you have counted at least 1,000 gifts ... 1095 to be exact.  You can read more about it here where she explains a little more in detail, and you can get a copy of January's Joy Dare  here at the end of this post by Ann.  Even though I'm a couple of days behind already, I think I'm going to attempt to do it.

I think it will be good for me to have some structure in being intentional about realizing the gifts the Lord has given me.  Realizing them, and being grateful for them.  Focusing on the bad comes so naturally to us, and I know for me, it's so easy to let it overwhelm me.

That's happening now.  Has been happening for months now.  I'm still fighting against a horrible depression and still on medication for the stomach ulcer that sent me to the ER doubled over in pain.  I'd love to remedy that.

I have a choice.  I can either wallow in all of the ugliness of life, or I can focus on the beauty of all I have been given.

... From everyone who has been given much, much will be required; and to whom they entrusted much, of him they will ask all the more. ~ Luke 12:48

Much I have been given, folks.  I'm off to count today's gifts, and hopefully, will write them out later today.

And if you'd like to join one of groups, even if you don't attend my church, let me know.  We'd love to have you join us.  I really think everyone is going to love this study.  I think it's the perfect one to do as we enter into this new year.  Being grateful for what we already have, rather than worrying over what we don't have.

I will give thanks to the LORD with all my heart; I will tell of all Your wonders. ~ Psalm 9:1

My 2012 Take-Away

I am not a fan of New Year's resolutions.  I never keep them, so why would I profess to do something knowing chances are by January 2 I will have already broken it?  Seems like any easy way to create something to just remind myself over and over throughout the year what a failure I am.

Um, no thank you.

I am grateful 2012 is gone.  It was the hardest year of my life.  A year full of heartache.  Loosing my mama in March has left a gaping wound in my heart.  A wound I'm not sure will ever heal.  Not this side of Heaven anyway.

Oh, how I miss her!

And there were lots of other hard things.  Too much tragedy.  Way too many tears.

I've been asking myself what my take-away from 2012 is going to be.

Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever. ~ Hebrews 13:8

He's the same Jesus on January 1, 2013 as He was January 1, 2012.  He was faithful then, He's faithful now.

He loves me.

Oh, how He loves me.

One of my most favorite songs is by David Crowder,  "How He Loves".

When I stop and really think about how much He loves me, I become so overwhelmed.  For someone who has spent most all of her life trying to convince Him to love her ... trying to be good enough or make up for past mistakes ... only to realize His love is unconditional, unwavering and undeserved ... well, it's more than I can process.

I am so grateful for His love.  I am grateful that His mercies are new every morning, and His grace is constantly being poured over me.

I couldn't have survived 2012 without Him.  He carried me through.

I had someone ask me a couple of weeks ago how I could still trust a God who had allowed everything that had happened in my life this past year.  She even brought my illness into the equation.  This question came from a friend who has seen all of the year's events.

I wasn't exactly sure how to answer her.  She's professes to be a Christian, so I wondered if maybe it was a trick question.

But she was serious.

So, I thought for a few moments, trying to come up with some sort of deep, theological reasoning.  Reasoning she wouldn't be able to argue with me about and would perhaps make me sound like a "super-Christian".

After a few moments I finally said, "Because I do".

Bad things are going to happened to us.  We are going to loose people we love.  We are going to hurt.  Some of us will experience chronic illness for which there is no cure.  We will watch those we love suffer, and not be able to do one thing to make it better.  The bible doesn't say, "if" it happens.  It says "whenever" it happens.

Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. ~ James 1:2-4

I don't claim to know all the reasons we suffer in this life, but I do know God is sovereign.  And just like Paul tells us, I believe everything happens for my good and His glory.

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified.  ~ Romans 8:28-30

I trust Him because He is trustworthy.  With His unending love, abundant grace and ever-flowing mercies He carries me through those seemingly unbearable moments.

And there have been a lot of those moments.

No doubt there will be more.

But I can face them knowing He's going to carry me through.

My take away from 2012 is understanding the love Jesus has for me just a little bit more than I did.  When I examine all of the events of this past year, there He was.

With love like a hurricane, He loves me.

And I am certain that on January 1, 2014 I will be able to look back at this year and see my Jesus was there supplying me with exactly what I need to get through each and every moment of the day.

Create in me a clean heart, O God, And renew a steadfast spirit within me. ~ Psalm 51:10

Happy 2013, y'all!!

Happy Birthday To My Dad

Today is my dad's 71st birthday.  I've been thinking a lot the past few days about just how blessed we are to have him.  We've been given strict instructions not to buy him anything, nor are we to throw him a party.

I just keep thinking about what a gift from the Lord Jesus he is to all of us.

ALL of us.

Each and every person who has ever met him.

I've thought about all the things he's given me.  I'm not talking about things you can pay money for either.

I'm talking about unconditional, unwavering, longsuffering love.

And choosing to be my dad.

Even long before he married my mom, he treated us as if we were his biological children. 

Sara wrote a sweet poem for English about him, and she has framed it to give to him when we go to visit him after church.

He's going to love it.

We love him so, so much!!